Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Sympathy Card

It's no secret on here that our son, Knox died at 4 months from SIDS. It's been just over 8 months now, since he died and his first birthday was recent. It's a horrible thing, and completely sporatic and random, as far as our son being super healthy, happy and adorable dying without any warning. Nothing can prepare someone for losing a child.

On the Cricut message boards, there is the job of being a 'card fairy' and I signed up right away to send cards to people who need cheering up, hellos, happy birthdays or anything else people ask for. My first mission to make a card for a family who lost their 9 month old son last week. I don't actually know them, their family or anything about the situation, other than it was completely out of nowhere and wasn't expected or prepared for. I was trying to think of the cards that meant the most to me when I got them after Knox died. We appreciated every card, but I think the most meaningful was a book from a friend, who had also lost a child. Her beautiful daughter, Kailey Pearl was stillborn. I've known this friend for a long while, we met working together and I grew to love her like a big sister. I really didn't know about her daughter until we started spending time together outside of work, and of course before I had children. I didn't know how to react or how to feel when she shared Kailey's story and little belongings with me at the time, now I know that was probably the most generous open-hearted thing she could have done; sharing her child's belongings with someone she didn't know very well.

Anyways, after Knox died my friend gave me a book at his funeral, and I read it cover to cover fairly quickly, it meant a lot to me to know that people can be 'okay' and survive something so horrible. For the family, I made a pretty simple card, because it doesn't mean anything extra for it to be fancy. I am also mailing them a few books I've enjoyed reading, and meant a lot to me. Like I said, I don't know them from adam but I hope that the books I send will at least help them to begin healing. I'm also including a letter I wrote for the wife and one for the husband as well. I don't think that people remember that the husbands are hurting too, people are too busy thinking about the moms. I know we had a lot of support, but it just isn't as mainstream to be there mentally for the husbands while they try and hold the pieces together, and provide for the family at the same time.

1 comment:

Jessica said...

That's a wonderful gesture, Dawn :)